When he hurts, I hurt. It makes me cry seeing he face screwed up in pain. I see his abdomen get bigger and can't imagine what the cancer in his liver is doing. I realized the extent of his frailness when bathing him hurt his skin. I don't know how he could get thinner than he is. Yet, he has decided to tone up his arms and wanted the hand weights. He counts how many times he gets up and walks. This man of mine is not going to lie in bed and take what comes.
When he sleeps, I sleep. We are up several times a night. Sometimes, I move into the spare room to give him the whole bed to try and find a way to ease the pain in his abdomen and his back. Then we cat nap 3-4 times during the day. I'm so blessed with the ability to lay my head anywhere, take 7 breaths and be out. Steve calls me a professional sleeper.
When he dies, I will die. I will go to bed and cover my head and will myself to die. Couples have been known to do that. I know I'm not as elderly as most who accomplish this, but I'll therefore have more brain cells to work with.
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness...