My Dearest Steven, how can I be doing all this without you? I'm wrapping gifts, Christmas music playing in the background, a tree all lit...and you are not here. A tree that you did not cut and balance just right in the base. How do I do this after 23 Christmases with you? 23 Christmas Eves of Lane brother get-togethers and you will not be with us. How will I be happy without you? What about the perfect gift you get me that is just right, the gentle kiss when we wake on Christmas morning? How will I watch our grandson open his gifts without you next to me? Who will make us all laugh with some antic.
I'm still breathing but nothing else is the same.