I had a friend who also lost his spouse after an a long period of care-giving. He said that it is now time to think about himself and what can make him happy.
I'm in this position too, and as liberating as it feels, it sounds...selfish. I have not been in this 'only me' state since forever. I went from home to husband to children and now, they have all gone on to live under their own umbrella.
So what if I turned the 'time to make ME happy' into 'what would make God happy?' I have so much time to talk to God now. There are some would say that I'm going back to holding an umbrella over someone's head, but it doesn't work that way with God. I know that if I make Him happy, I'm going to be filled with a joy that is unobtainable from any other source.
Step one today, find out what makes God happy. Journal about it, pray about it, and of course blog about it.