I had the weirdest dream last night that I was held. Held as in man and wife at night sleeping. It wasn't a sexual thing at all, just that physical warm enfolding that we take for granted when we are married for years.
But, I woke up sad and missing Steven. We knew just how to fit. Someday, I'll have that again. And he and I will learn. It seemed so long ago since I had been held while I slept. I don't know why I can't be happy I had it in a dream.